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Posts Tagged ‘x-men’

Are you fucking kidding me with this bullshit? I’m just about ready to tell this list to go fuck itself. Maybe I shouldn’t be writing when I’m premenstrual and dealing with some annoying personal shit, but whatever. I don’t give a fuck.

You know what hero has let me down? Fucking Wolverine. Yeah, goddamn Logan from X-Men. Hugh Jackman played a total dick of a human being in the movie Chappie. Yes, I saw Chappie last night, because friends and Die Antwoord. Surprisingly (or not), I enjoyed the movie once people stopped throwing popcorn at me. As my astute friend predicted, I cried over the plight of robots. Not humans, robots! Well, okay, maybe one of the humans. But no spoilers! The tears may also have been due to the two beers I consumed prior to the movie and said PMS, but who’s counting? Though clearly a work of fiction, Chappie reminded me of how much people suck. Not that I needed much of a reminder, because I have eyes and ears.

Anyway, the letter. Here goes…

Dear Logan (aka Wolverine),

Why did you have to be so cool in X-Men, only to become a rugby ball-cuddling meat-head whose selfish actions made me want to vomit popcorn and (root)beer all over the movie theater?

Love,

TJ

P.S. Lose the mullet.

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